Select Your Way To Elegance

From the root word of Elegance, it means to select. Words in the thesaurus are, pick out, single out, sort out, opt for, decide on, settle on, determine, hand-picked, prime, first rate, first class, superior, finest, best, top-class, superb, excellent, elite, favored, privileged, wealthy.

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I know there are some of us who do not like to make decisions (including me). However, making good choices is a life skill and it is something we did from a very young age, and will continue to do throughout our lives.

Making good choices is essential for an elegant life. It is vital for a well life. We cannot simply expect everything to be handed to us, or take in whatever life or circumstances throw at us.

We also cannot afford the time to go searching and evaluating every single item in the mall, opportunity, friend etc.

There are simple guidelines we can keep in mind, principles, to be exact.

Take An Inventory Of Yourself and Life

To live better, there must be some sort of measure. You need to know what you are good at, as well as the areas that you are not so good at.

For instance if you would like to spend more time with your children, you'll have to look at your schedules thoroughly, shift things around and see if you could get something done more efficiently to accommodate more time with the kids.

You may use this template or formulate your own. It does not have to be very structured but simply helps you 'measure' your life.

Name: Eunice J Leong

Goals: Be creative, be financially independent, be a family-first person, have a social life, Church, Exercise, Health and Beauty.

Be creative: Blog, Write for The Elegant Woman, Plan parties, Decorate my home.

Financially Independent: Work for multiple streams of income, invest well, aim for passive income.

Family-first person: Be a wife and mother first. Leave those things that are not constructive for US the family.

Have a social life: I make an effort to celebrate my friends' birthday, plan dinners, coffees and the occasional elegant party. In my mind, I select my friends and do not give into too many social engagements.

Church: I make it a point and a ritual to go to church every Sunday

Exercise: I try to get 10,000 steps a day, do my ballet stretches once a week, and cycling with family and friends randomly. I ski during winter, play tennis and golf randomly.

Health: I try to sleep well, eat veggies and fruits and drink water. I eat whatever in smaller portions.

Beauty: I'm seeking what is best for my skin, and pay attention to my make up, care, sleep, water intake etc. I have a list of recommended beauticians and doctors which I see whenever.

As time is very important to me, I try to say no to unnecessary and pointless activities, for instance, I get quite a bit of media invites to parties and I never go to them unless a friend is being featured and I'm going to support him/her(I used to, in my younger days). We have to try to seek balance in everything. If you do not have the time, do not attempt to do more than you should.

* Try to remember what you are good at and only work on your strengths.

Make lists

I constantly make lists. I am a list-maker.

By making lists, I get things done as I tick things off. There is also a sense of accomplishment. It takes the stress off as well. You don't have to try to remember, or think about it too much. I keep a notepad near my bed when I sleep. I realize sometimes I get insomnia by thinking about all the things I need to do the next day. So instead, I write them down and feel at peace that I won't forget them tomorrow morning.

List all the things you need to do in the house, all the things you need for work, make a travel-packing list and use it for the rest of your life.

I have a daily list, weekly list, monthly list and a yearly list.

I also have a list for house chores amongst other things.

Soon, it will be by instinct and you don't have to rely on your list, but it's security to have them there.

Create schedules

Set up little routines to get things done.

Set systems in your life.

For example, trash has to be taken out after dinner, you walk only in the evenings at 5pm, laundry is done every Thursday and you'll only spend thirty minutes reading before bed.

Create an inner circle

Create one for your friends.

We all need friendships and relationships in our lives. Although it sounds quite businesslike, to have a system to depend on helps us keep and increase the quality of our relationships. Sometimes we 'forget' or miss out a person because of the busy-ness of our lives. It's good to make a little list of those you want to keep close to you. You could also set reminders on your email or calendar to remember their birthdays.

Set things that you do together.

For each of my friends, we have a favourite hang out place or a regular activity that we like to do together. It is true that most of us can't sit around and talk all day or have coffee and dinner all the time.

The best kind to meet friends is to invite them into your home for dinner, a cocktail party, brunch, afternoon tea. It is affordable, your friends do not have to spend a thing and it's comfortable - away from the crowd.

Create one for all those who help you in life.

For example,

Make a list of your of phone numbers, email addresses, - dentist- doctor- accountants- housekeeping- travel agent- real estate agent- beauticians- Manicurist- Make up artist- Photographer- Videographer- Decorator- Baker or cake shop- Florist- Names of favourite restaurants - Dress maker/ Tailor

It becomes handy and helps you to be efficient. Of course, take your time in selecting your vendors. Choose what is best for you.

Set rules

Set rules for

- food

- shopping (for instance, you'll never shop for clothes unless you throw out some etc.)

- spending money

- romantic dates with your husband

- family time

- spending time with extended family

- friends

In other words,

take time to make choices, to set systems and routine and these will work for you. Living a less-frazzled life helps you live more. Have fun!

P.s. I will soon create downloadable sheets for this page, watch this space!

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