On Status & Reality

by Belinda
(New York, NY, USA)

Dear Eunice,

I love reading Elegant Woman. The articles have stimulated such a positive change in me. I am a college student and for the first time, I am confronting the differences between myself and people from wealthier families.

As an elegant woman, there is a focus on quality and simplicity. However, whenever I am near one of the many girls with their designer this or that I feel so insecure.

My family has always made sure that I have quality clothes, but never at the expense of going into debt. On one hand I struggle with feeling less than and on the other hand I sometimes feel like a status "faker". I have nice clothes, nice shoes, perfumes etc. but I have horrendous spending habits so I rarely keep enough money for important necessities. I feel so ashamed. It is really affecting my self esteem.

I feel that I am a walking cliché, the girl who is pretending to be rich with externals. I need advice about how to feel like what I have is enough and also not feel ashamed about owning and wanting to have "nice" things.