I think that getting defensive stems from a poor sense of self and needing outside validation. No one likes getting criticized no matter how warranted. But I have found having melt downs like a child —especially public reflects badly on me. Given that I am a very sensitive, so I normally hold my tongue and if I have to approach the person who criticized me later and in private I will do so. But generally I am old enough now that I learn to ‘consider the source’ and pick my battles.