Simplified broken engagement etiquette.
How do you deal with a broken engagement? How do you handle a cancelled wedding graciously?
It is never an easy thing to do. But here are some guidelines to handle with utmost dignity.
Broken Engagement Etiquette
Recall With Dignity
You need not offer any explanations other than a simple, “It was a mutual decision – we have the highest esteem for each other. Thank you for your kind understanding.”
If formal invitations have already been sent out, they must be formally recalled.
“Mr and Mrs Henderson announce that the marriage of their daughter, Ivy Henderson will not take place.”
If these formal announcements will not get the message across in time, call immediately offering a brief explanation and apology, especially if it is a destination wedding, which involves expenses on the wedding guests’ parts.
Do not divulge in lengthy explanations even though those with little courtesy will try to probe why, simply repeat the above explanation and add “I’m really sorry, I have to go call other people.”
How Should A Guest Respond To A Cancelled Wedding
When you receive a notice of a cancelled wedding, how should you respond?
Calling the bride will put her in a spot for some explanation. Not responding will leave them wondering if you got the note.
Dash off a note, “I wish you all the best, and would love to see you.”
If you are a closer friend, assure her that she doesn’t have to talk about it. Continue that friendship as normal. Never bring up the subject unless she chooses to do so. She will definitely appreciate it.
Be the kind of friend that she can enter again into normal social life with no explanations required. It will definitely be very welcomed.
Should You Return the Engagement Ring?
A common question asked about broken engagement etiquette, Should you return the engagement ring?
There is the usual understanding that a lady who breaks off the engagement returns the ring. However, in most cases, the lady keeps the ring if the broken engagement was not initiated by her.
If you wish for your ring to be returned, kindly make your request up to a few times, otherwise, you may resort to consult a lawyer to add pressure.
Wedding Presents in Broken Engagement Etiquette
If a wedding is called off, wedding and shower gifts are returned.
It doesn’t matter if they still continue to be a couple to set up home.
Give about a month after the announcement of the cancelled wedding to allow yourself wondering about your presents.
You could make a polite inquiry with either the bride or groom’s parents.
If you cancelled your wedding, be prompt about returning presents, especially if your guests have made arrangements to travel etc.
Dealing With An Broken Engagement
It’s never easy to deal with a broken engagement, however, whatever you do, try to make the situation as comfortable as possible with everyone. Stay calm and do not give into your emotions which will normally be running high.
Do not look back and keep moving forward.
As news will go, things will blow over sooner than later. Comfort yourself with the fact that some people will be secretly admire the courage that they didn’t have.