Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette 2

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What is this page about? Bridal shower gift etiquette, sending a wedding gift etiquette, bridal shower etiquette, etiquette

So If I’m The Bride?

It is not well mannered or good etiquette to “expect” gifts.

Similar, the bridal shower should not be hosted by you, so neither should you indicate in any way to your host and your guests that a gift is expected.

Although it is fine for your hosts to your hosts to include registry information in a shower invitation (never in a wedding invitation), or so it says in most etiquette books.

(In my humble opinion, I think the ideas of registries are distasteful because one is actually going on a shopping spree putting them on a list and getting people to go pay for it and deliver it.)

What is worse is when people put not-so-modest items on the registry.

I’d rather guests place a ‘return and exchanges’ gift note to allow the brides to exchange them discretely for the items they need.

If it were up to me to give recommendations, I’d rather not mention anything about gifts and have my closest friends come with what they think its appropriate or anything at all.

With saying that, I also think it is unwise to go “your presence, not presents are sufficient” or “No gifts”. Somethings are better left unsaid.

Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette

Gifts At The Shower

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Opening gifts in front of everyone is looked almost as a form of entertainment and perhaps a visual and verbal thank you so that your guests would leave feeling satisfied that you indeed liked their gift.

Personally, I’ve never liked being in the spotlight especially opening all my gifts in front of everyone. I’d rather open in my own privacy and write personal thank you notes to my gift givers.

Also, in some parties where many are invited, opening gifts take a long time and I’m sure time could be put to better use.

It is true that some consider it rude if the bride doesn’t open gifts at a shower.

I’d personally think that if the guests really wanted the bride to open her gift, they could go up in person and request that they wished to see her do so. She could then do so in a corner or so. It is never polite to put someone on the spot, so it would be very kind to ask first if she wanted to do so.

being in the spotlight

What kind of show are you putting on?

If you are at your shower and absolutely hate to open gifts in front of others, discretely inform your host, who will ensure that you will never be put on a spot by other guests who think they have a right to see you open your presents.

If you do enjoy opening presents in front of your crowd, by all means do so. Remember to take note of the names of the presents, so that you can write appropriate more personal thank you messages later.

However, if you do have more the thirty presents, do not hold your audiences captive by making them watch you open presents. After all, this ritual is more appropriate at a child’s birthday party.

Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette

Do Not Forget Your Host

The bridal shower is an event you’ll want to remember. But don’t forget those who made the effort, spent time and money to make it happen!

It is common courtesy to help out your host with your guest list and any other minor thing she’ll have you do when she volunteers to host your bridal shower. Maybe you’ll have to go with her to the florist to pick the flowers you love, or if she asks you endless questions about what colour schemes you like or bridal shower games if you’ll like to play.

Even if the shower was a blast or kind of a flop, you have to remember it was out of your interest that she held the bridal shower in your honor and you should appreciate and not forget that.

So… don’t forget to send her a really good gift and a heart warming thank you note.

You could personalize it by including a photo of both of you.

You also honour her by posting photos from the shower to your wedding website.

Interesting gift ideas that are personal and useful could be custom stationary, a monogrammed bathrobe or cosmetic pouches, guest towels. Include luxurious items such as set of beautiful candles, luxury soaps.

Read more about gift etiquette!

Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette

What To You Give If The Person Clearly Doesn’t Need It

Going to a bridal shower and do not know what gift is appropriate to give?

What do you do when someone says, “Oh, don’t worry, we’ve been living together for a while now, we don’t need anything”.

Or what bridal shower gift to you take to someone at a shower when she has been married before?

little blue teapot

In general, even though someone claims to have everything, there is surely something you can contribute to make one’s home nicer, or replace something else with a better coffee maker, for instance.

If you truly care about your friend whom the bridal shower was given in her honour, I’m sure you’ll be pleased to figure out what to give, something that she’ll really like.

Presents for 2nd weddings bridal showers are not traditional, so maybe something more generic like bathroom candles, luxury soaps, or even flowers would be more appropriate.

Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette

The Gracious Bride

Grace is the essence during the gift opening process.

Like all presents opened in front of your giver, you should always employ a happy and appreciative attitude no matter how much you dislike it, already have it, or don’t exactly know what it is. Say, ‘wow, thank you, I can’t wait to use it (or figure out how to use it)’ with a big smile.

Remember your thank you notes and a special gift for the host.

You might want to return the favour when your host or bridesmaids get married. See also How to be an elegant bride.

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